The nagging injury

Five or six years ago, when I lived in NYC, my friend and I were at the gym after work. We were finishing up our workout and then she bet that I couldn’t do a pull up from a dead hang. I was offended and informed her that I could ABSOLUTELY  do it.

I got 75% of the way up and my neck tweaked so badly that I couldn’t move it for days. I went to a spinal specialist at Beth Israel and got an MRI and the result was that I had two discs in my neck that were “bulging” – which is not what they are supposed to do. Despite my explanation that my brave attempt at a pull up caused this problem, my doctor explained that my poor posture was actually the culprit and the pull up was more of “the straw that broke the camel’s back” and that I was WAY too young (23 or so at the time) to have such a serious injury. Defeated and scared, I took off from running for a long time, about six months (my second longest gap) and went to physical therapy and an ART/Chiropractor in order to heal up properly. I am also VERY aware of my posture now. Any time I catch myself hunching over, I straighten right up!

I did heal, but it comes back to haunt me more often than I would like and it will be so random. For example, about 3 years ago, Fizz jumped out behind a door and scared me and my neck went to the dark place and I was horizontal for 3 days. And then there are times (like Monday evening) that it happens without any trigger. I could just turn to look at something and bam, I can’t move.

ANYWAY – that whole story was to tell you guys that I had to take off Monday and Tuesday from running to rest my devil of a neck. It normally takes 2-3 days and then I go back to normal. It is not fun but I also don’t have a solution either.

Who else has an annoying injury like this?

 

Dear Jennie (11 Months)

Dear Jennie,

I am getting really emotional as we approach your first birthday. It is absolutely wild that this is the last month of your first year in this world. The changes are coming so rapidly that I feel like I can’t keep up yet I am on this ride with you with my hands in the air and having the time of my life.

baby jennie fizz

Within a few weeks, you went from *just* being able to pull yourself up to standing on your own for a long period of time to sprinting across the room with your push dog. I need to get you a nice pair of shoes because I have no doubt you will be walking soon.

baby jennie fizz

TOO FAST FOR PHOTOS!!!

You are quite the explorer. You go from one area in the room to another and play with anything you can get your hands on. We are working on putting EVERYTHING away and baby proofing (so you can’t climb the stairs or crawl into cabinets)!

baby jennie fizz baby proofing

Your first (and favorite) phrase is definitely “UH OH” and you know exactly what it means. You are so smart (and devious) already. You drop things on purpose and say “UH OH” over and over again. Another favorite of mine is when we play peek-a-boo because I am guaranteed to get a deep belly laugh from you! You show your toothy grin pretty often, and that makes me happy. Just last week you started making an amazing pout face, which also makes me happy! It is hilarious.

We took another (short) road trip this month to visit our friends Katie & Randy and baby Alex! Mommy and Katie grew up next door to one another and were best friends from birth! You and Alex are only 3 weeks apart. These times together are so special to us!

ashley jennie katie alex

Left: May 2014, Right: February 2015

 

At 11 months, you weigh 18 lb 7 oz and are a little peanut (compared to the size you were when you entered this world)! I am so proud that you are growing right on target and SO happy that we are still going strong with breastfeeding but you are getting quite picky with solid food, which is a bit stressful. Your favorite food is still blueberries and I don’t see that changing any time soon. We always have blueberries on hand just in case you won’t eat anything else. You also had I your first taste of meat this month (which was a big deal for me as a vegetarian) but you loved it (duh).

At daycare, you are starting to transition to the next room. You need shoes and will soon sleep on a mat instead of a crib. I still think of you as the new kid on the block but in reality, you are huge compared to the tiny new babes!

baby jennie fizzMy sweet baby girl, I love you so much. You bet I am going to cherish these last few days of your first year (I still can’t believe it)!

Love always,

Mommy

 

It’s not getting any easier

I have been back at work for 8 months. When I leave the house every morning, I sadly think, “Another day away from Jennie” and give myself a little pep talk to get through the day. I am gone from 730 AM – 7:30 PM. That’s  12 hours a day, 5 days a week and that is a lot of freaking time.

While I absolutely adore and trust all of the teachers at her daycare, I’m afraid. I’m afraid to miss the milestones like her first steps (which are just around the corner) or her first real words and phrases. I’m afraid to miss watching her learn and develop. This weekend she repeated a phrase I said “ALL DONE!” after I changed her diaper and I just about cried because I was so excited. How much of this am I missing though? How much is too much?  Will she forgive me for being away from her all of these hours? What am I going to do when I have another child and have to do it all over again? Having a baby has made me so emotional, which is obvious.

baby Jennie fizz

Don’t get me wrong, I have gotten used to being away from her. It is the reality of the situation. Along with countless other parents, I have to work. But that doesn’t mean that it gets any easier. I don’t think it will ever get any easier and I am not sure I will ever stop feeling sad each morning!

baby jennie fizz

Note: These feelings are always there but the post was triggered by the fact that I had to go to work this morning (I had some time-sensitive things to get done today) and leave my sick baby home. She is with her dad, so she is in great hands of course, but it still doesn’t make me feel any less guilty for not being there.

Let’s move on to running (because that was depressing)….

2/16/15-2/22/15 (Week 3 of NJ Half Training)

M: 6 mi run @ 9:23

T: 30 min yoga, 10 min hip strength, 15 min leg strength

W: 6 mi run (1 mi wu @ 9:31, 4 mi tempo @ 7:50, 1 mi cd @ 9:31), 10 min hip strength

Th: off

F: off

S: 4 mi run @ 9:31, 10 min hip strength, 30 min full body strength

Su: 8.2 mi run @ 9:16 – I was THRILLED that it was 40 degrees yesterday (in NJ)! This was the first run I did outdoors in many weeks and it felt fantastic. I had great company and the run was effortless. I cannot wait for the Spring!

Totals: 24.2 mi run, 75 min strength, 30 min yoga

Working moms: Does it ever get easier? Any tips on how to not feel guilty as shit?

Who else is excited for the Spring weather? I am SO over this winter/wind/cold/snow.